Iguana Soup?

Leon – Managua, Nicaragua

Growing up I spent a lot of time in Duluth. Helping at my grandparents’ motel – which was, at the time, called the Willard Motel. Hanging out with my grandparents and some friends I had up there. That type of thing. 

One day I must have biked up the Munger Trail (named after my Grandpa, who was a state representative who was way ahead of his time on environmental issues) and I was up by Jay Cooke State Park when I saw a kid with a giant snapping turtle. I don’t remember exactly, but I think he was holding it by the tail. Or maybe he had something tied to the tail? I don’t know – but I was pretty impressed.

He said he was going to sell the turtle to the local Chinese restaurant – I think the Red Dragon or something. Maybe they would make turtle soup, I don’t know.

And then – my recollection is a little jumbled – but I remember this was my first real experience with snapping turtles. I think the kid put it down and I wanted to see what it would do if I waved something in front of it. I found a stick and started poking toward the snapping turtle.

Nothing. 

A little closer. 

Nothing.

A little closer yet . . . SNAP

Well, that wasn’t a good idea. In one fell swoop the pre-historic creature – which was about 2’ across – lunged at the stick and, instantaneously, cut it in two. Only about 6” from my hand. 

Dang. Snapping turtles are bad ass!

I’m a lot more respectful around snappers these days . . .

All this came flooding back to me this afternoon – when we saw a young Nicaraguan carrying two more-Nicaraguan reptiles: iguanas. 

We pulled over, snapped a photo, and asked the young man what he was planning to do with the giant lizards. 

“Sell them,” his friend said in Spanish. The guy holding the iguanas was not real talkative . . .

And with that Mr. Iguana started walking off. He had no time for foolish tourists. 

So we don’t know anything else. We don’t know if he was selling them as pets or as food (Let’s be honest – this is Nicaragua. Probably food). We don’t know how much he was selling them for. We don’t know what kind of iguanas they were or how he came to have them in his possession. 

We do know that people eat iguanas down here. Just the other day at our dinner party with Peter and Sue, Sue was telling us that she had had iguana soup or something with their neighbors (Marcario’s wife, Yami, prepared it). 

I’m not sure I could get myself to eat an iguana. But, then again, I’m a soft American . . .raised on hamburgers and macaroni and cheese . . .

We have actually made several failed attempts at American type food in the last day.

Last night we were thinking pizza. There were a bunch of pizza places in Leon so we thought we were on to something . . .

We had sat down at one place before Diana looked up the reviews:

”The dough is like sugar . . .”

”Took an hour and wasn’t good . . .”

We paid for my beer (Tona – my new favorite – Nicaragua’s version of Budweiser I guess . . .) and went on to another place with better ratings.

I ordered pizza at the new place, and I was pretty excited – but the waitress came back a minute later:

”No pizza tonight. It is impossible.”

Diana wanted to ditch out of there too – but by this time we just needed food. Dinner turned out fine – just not what we were thinking of originally.

And then this morning Diana had tracked down a French bakery that the reviews said was good. We purchased several things, including some almond croissants and some whole grain buns. 

We were pretty excited – and the excitement powered our ride this morning. We even visited a regular Nicaraguan panaderia (bakery) along the way – and convinced ourselves that between the French and Nicaraguan bakeries we could have a real lunch.

But when we finally sat down for our mid-day meal we were, as usual when it comes to bakeries in this part of the world, pretty disappointed. The almond croissants were meh. 

“That’s not even real marzipan,” Diana said, as she threw the croissant to the side. (It’s hard to please Diana on the baking front . . .)

”The problem is that they use cheap shortening down here. There just doesn’t seem to be much real butter . . .” (Butter and cream and yogurt – or the lack thereof – are kind of daily sources of disappointment for Dr. Liu lately . . .)

You could just see the energy drain away from Diana. She had really been looking forward to what a real French bakery might offer . . . Although we both agreed that the whole grain buns were good. Diana’s comment: “Yes, they’re pretty good. But they could use some butter or cheese . . .”

And the Nicaraguan place? Even worse. 

“This seems like it was made from a cake mix – but with a weird taste,” Diana said, as she threw aside this yellow thing that we thought might be good corn cake. 

“I don’t even think the animals will eat it,” she added.

But that’s a lesson that we should have learned by now. My theory is that they don’t grow wheat down here so they would have to import any real flour. Too expensive. And probably difficult to keep it from going rancid when it’s this hot and humid all the time . . .

And, as for the pizza, we might just break down and get a Little Ceasar’s next time. Everyone else around here seems to like it . . .

Okay – but don’t let all this New York Times Food Review stuff make you feel sorry for us. Another beautiful day of biking through the Nicaraguan countryside. Lots of horse drawn carts. 

We biked past, and ate our panned lunch, on the shores of Lago Xolotian – a fresh water lake that, I guess, is home to some crocodiles. (Diana did not swim . . . Although it was windy and wavy – which probably has more to do with her restraint than the nasty reptiles . . .)

All in all, a very good day. Now off to eat some Nicaraguan food. Enough swimming against the current. (Do iguanas swim?)